02May
Perception is reality, except when it is not. You may be thinking, “What does that mean?” If I think you are angry at me, then my reality is just that. You have a terrible pounding headache as I approach you for conversation. With none of your usual welcoming presence, I begin to “awfulize.” I misinterpret your pain as dissatisfaction with me. You try unsuccessfully to pretend that you are not in pain. I translate your faltering attempt as evidence that I’ve done something wrong or am simply no longer welcome. And “down the rabbit hole” that encounter tumbles.
In most encounters, whatever I think is happening becomes my reality, even when it is not reality. How do we deal with perceptions? “The purposes of a person’s heart are deep waters, but one who has insight draws them out.” (Proverbs 20:5 NIV) How do we draw out those buried feelings? Are you ready for some true profundity? We ask about our perception! Easy said and challenging to do when we perceive something is amiss.
Try such questions as, “Is this a good time, or should I get back with you later?” That simple question acknowledges the other person and makes room for you two to plan a successful encounter. Another way to explore the reality is to ask, “Have I done something wrong? If so, I would consider it a favor if you told me so I can make things right.” When body language is driving perception, use questions to unscramble the confusion.
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